Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Apples: don't you just want to throw them?

Throw it! C'mon! Do it!

A few weeks back while picking apples for a friend, someone commented about how there's something about apples that makes you want to throw them. They're the perfect size-to-weight ratio, fairly round, fit nicely in your hand; whenever you hold one you really have to resist the urge to just throw it as far as you can for fun. If a chain link fence is nearby the problem is worse, because whooping an apple into a chain link fence and seeing it sliced into pieces when it hits is ridiculously fun.

I keep apples in my fridge at work. Each day I eat one I rinse it off at the drinking fountain and during the ten step walk back to my office I struggle to not chuck it across the building for funsies. I imagine one of these days I'll crack and just let it fly. Hopefully I'll have another job lined up by then because I imagine I'll have HR talking to me by the end of that day.

The twitter feed appears to be down again, but it's down on every site I visit and earlier today the twitter site itself was down for database work. I like having it; mostly I just put random quotes that come up in conversations on there. The current one reads "We'll always have the Jet Star" which is a reference to when I was last at an amusement park here called Lagoon. There's a ride, the Jet Star, which has two people sitting one in front of the other on one chair. We had four people in our group - two guys and two girls: it should have been just fine. Due to animosity or perhaps downright cruelty, the girls decided to go in the same car. This left the other guy and me to share one, which led to a phrase I never thought I'd utter to another man: "Do you want to be the big spoon or the little spoon?"

He chose to be the big spoon.

That was about four months ago. We haven't spooned since; it was a one-ride stand.

One last thing: I have to include this link because it's one of the funniest things I think I've ever read. Just be warned: it contains some graphic language, so don't click it if you're offended by such things.

1 comment:

--jeff * said...

jamie had an apple tree in his back yard. not only were they delicious apples, they (and the surrounding chain link fence) provided excellent options for "calvin ball".