Tuesday, June 16, 2009


300 posts in two years

This is the 300th post for in search of a muse. I was thinking of making a 300 movie reference or perhaps talking again about the 300 Workout again (which I'd really rather not talk about since I am not nearly in as good of shape as I was then and it'd just be a sad physical display for all who witness it). I thought about doing similar to what I did in my 200th post and talk about things relevant to that number. I thought about not mentioning it at all and going on business-as-usual.

This is also the two year anniversary of my first post on this blog. That's only half a coincidence. I noticed I was close to a two year mark when I wrote this. This was meant to be posted last Friday when I noticed I was four days away from the two year mark. Then saw I had a few unposted entries from the past two years which it was counting towards my 300 total. Technically this meant that while 300 posts were written, only 296 were posted. Had I left it as it was, I would have been robbing you of four posts, most of which are the ones you've been reading over the weekend. I went through the drafts and found the ones I liked, cleaned them up a bit, refined them, and posted them. (Two of which I didn't think were very good but I was too lazy to rewrite them so I just posted them on their original written dates.)

I thought about linking to Seth Godin's blog (the most popular blog written by a single person on the net) where he says the best way to success on the internet or in life is just to be persistent and patient. I thought about linking to some talks from TED or from Intelligence Squared that have had an effect on me and how I view the world personally. I thought about writing something long and drawn out detailing how I'm surprised I've made it to this many posts.

Then I thought "Why should I write something long and drawn out when I can just post something long and drawn out that someone else has already written?"

So that's what I'm doing--I'm passing the buck and am posting the "I Believe" speech from Neil Gaiman's American Gods.
I can believe things that are true and I can believe things that aren't true and I can believe things where nobody knows if they're true or not. I can believe in Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny and Marilyn Monroe and the Beatles and Elvis and Mister Ed. Listen–I believe that people are perfectible, that knowledge is infinite, that the world is run by secret banking cartels and is visited by aliens on a regular basis, nice ones who look like wrinkledy lemurs and bad ones who mutilate cattle and want our water and our women. I believe that the future sucks and I believe that the future rocks and I believe that one day White Buffalo Woman is going to come back and kick everyone's ass. I believe that all men are just overgrown boys with deep problems communicating and that the decline of good sex in America is coincident with the decline in drive-in movie theaters from state to state. I believe that all politicians are unprincipled crooks and I still believe that they are better than the alternative. I believe that California is going to sink into the sea when the big one comes, while Florida is going to dissolve into madness and alligators and toxic waste. I believe that antibacterial soap is destroying our resistance to dirt and disease so that one day we'll all be wiped out by the common cold like the Martians in War of The Worlds. I believe that the greatest poets of the last century were Edith Sitwell and Don Marquis, that jade is dried dragon sperm, and that thousands of years ago in a former life I was a one-armed Siberian shaman. I believe that mankind's destiny lies in the stars. I believe that candy really did taste better when I was a kid, that it's aerodynamically impossible for a bumblebee to fly, that light is a wave and a particle, that there's a cat in a box somewhere who's alive and dead at the same time (although if they don't ever open the box to feed it it'll eventually just be two different kinds of dead), and that there are stars in the universe billions of years older than the universe itself. I believe in a personal god who cares about me and worries and oversees everything I do. I believe in an impersonal god who set the universe in motion and went off to hang with her girlfriends and doesn't even know that I'm alive. I believe in an empty and godless universe of causal chaos, background noise, and sheer blind luck. I believe that anyone who says that sex is overrated just hasn't done it properly. I believe that anyone who claims to know what's going on will lie about the little things too. I believe in absolute honesty and sensible social lies too. I believe in a woman's right to choose, a baby's right to live, that while all human life is sacred there's nothing wrong with the death penalty if you can trust the legal system implicitly, and that no one but a moron would ever trust the legal system. I believe that life is a game, that life is a cruel joke, and that life is what happens when you're alive and that you might as well lie back and enjoy it.
And that's my 300th post. If you keep reading, I'll keep updating. With enough practice I might be able to write something as good as that speech someday.

1 comment:

Nana Layne said...
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